March 11, 2008 - TuesdayPosted at 05:00:00 AM
March 11, 2008 - Tuesday  | Yin and Yang I got a phone call last week that just stopped me in my tracks. My aunt who had been battling cancer was losing the fight. All of my family went to the hospice to see her and to tell her we loved her. She was asleep most of the time, but on the rare occasion she would open her eyes just for a split second to let you know that she could hear you and that she knew you were there was just awesome.
By midweek I was feeling horrible. My body just seemed pissed off at me. My back, stomach, and hip were all hurting so much, but I just tried to suck it up. I went in that morning for more injections in my back so that hopefully my back pain would subside. I ended up getting 12 injections! Thank gawd they knocked me out. After my injections my mom and I went to the hospice to see my aunt and to see how my cousins and grandma were holding up. Everyone was doing alright and staying strong.
Throughout the week I started feeling worse and worse to the point that I couldn't really get out of bed and when that crap starts it so pisses me off because that means that I might only get 50% instead of 100% out of myself in therapy. On Friday I woke up and felt so-so. I still wasn't sleeping because of the pain, but at least I was so-so.
On Friday night Jen and Anne flew in to visit. I was stoked they were coming, but especially after everything started happening through the course of the week. They are two really amazing women and I'm so lucky to have them in my life.
Saturday Polly and I were supposed to take them to Venice to check it out, but I was in such bad shape that we called it off and stayed at the house and relaxed most the day. Towards the end of the day I started to feel a lot better so we invited pretty much my whole family over to eat and relax and get their mind off everything. We had such a great time just being together and telling stories.
On Sunday we drove to my house in Los Alamitos so that Anne could take the rest of her pics. Anne took the B & W photos of me while I was at Craig and she submitted them to a film festival in Telluride and got in, which was awesome. But she needed to take a few more to finish up so that's why she came out. So we spent Sunday messing around in my garage getting what she needed and then ended up at Sport Chalet for like 4 hours trying on snow pants. Well, actually I think it took that long because Jen was trying on every single hat and beanie they had there. Good times...good times.
Yesterday Jen and Anne took me to therapy and I had one of if not my best days there. I worked with Kathy my therapist for 2 hours. First we stretched, then we worked on the bolster with me walking on my knees, then the treadmill (yes, I'm still on .5 mph, BUT I did move my left leg all by myself with no help from Kathy!), and then the coolest thing of all. I rode a stationary bike....ALL BY MYSELF!!!! Seriously, it was so freakin' cool! I couldn't stop smiling! My left leg is stronger than my right so it was of course helping the right leg, but I sooo don't care. I'm putting up videos of me riding the bike so check them out.
After such an amazing day yesterday today was just the opposite. My aunt wasn't doing very well at all, but the good thing was that they upped her meds and she wasn't feeling any pain. That was the most important thing to all of us. It's just a crazy thing that all that chemo she got was trying to save her, but at the same time it was ruining her. My aunt passed today and it was a terribly sad thing, but my family is handling it so very well.
I am lucky to have the family that I do and I love them very much. I am feeling better myself and look forward to this week and my therapy and getting even stronger.
tara
Never Give Up! |
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